The Gift of Giving & Receiving

The gift of giving

The world is in a continuous state of circulation and flow. Whether it is the water cycle, the breathing cycle or the changing of the seasons, everything is in constant motion. Giving and receiving is similar - they work together. In order to give, there must be a receiver. Giving is about outflow and receiving is about inflow. The most important thing about giving and receiving is your intention behind it. Guest blogger Jane Taylor explores giving and receiving.

Three types of people

In his book Give and Take, Adam Grant refers to a variety of research and ideas to help people succeed and build relationships. According to Grant there are three types of people - the taker, the matcher and the giver. Simply, they are:

• Takers - are always trying to get as much as possible from others,
• Matchers - who if they did you a favour, would expect one back (and vice versa), and
• Givers - go out of their way to support and help you, with no strings attached.

Another way of looking at giving is by :

1. Giving unconditionally - no strings attached and from the heart,
   
2. Giving to receive - giving to receive something back in return, and
3. Giving to gain - giving to gain something.

How do you tell what type of giving you are doing?

Simple - identify why you are giving!

It took me a while to really understand the different types of giving and why I was giving. However, once I started to reflect and understand why I was giving and how I was feeling when I gave, I started to adjust my thoughts and behaviours accordingly. I am also practising to give and not tell anybody about it (which is lots of fun and something I learnt from Mother Theresa). Another thing I have learnt is - if you feel as though you have lost something through giving, then that is not truly giving.

"The most important thing about giving

and receiving

is your intention behind it."

Practicing giving

The simplest way to practice giving is any time you come in to contact with someone, give them something. How, you might ask? There are many ways to give and giving doesn't have to cost money. Some examples of giving that do not cost money include giving

• A compliment,
  
• A flower,
• Kindness,
• Thanks,
• A message,
• A note, and
• Paying attention to someone.

The Gift of Receiving

If you are anything like me, receiving can feel uncomfortable. However, every giver needs a receiver. There are many ways we can open up to receive each day. Some of the ways you receive the gifts of nature include:

1. Sunlight,
   
2. Water to drink,
   
3. The air we breath, and
   
4. The sound of the birds singing.
   

Other things we can receive include 

1. Compliments,
   
2. Gifts,
3. Attention,
4. Flowers,
5. Cards, and
6. Thank you's.

What other things can you receive?

If you want...

If you have been reading my journal for a while, you will know I love quotes. One of the quotes that resonates with me around giving is by Zig Ziglar. He has been quoted as saying - “You will get all you want in life, if you help enough other people get what they want.” So...

• If you want joy, give joy to other people,
• If you want attention, give attention to other people,
• If you want appreciation, give appreciation to other people,
• If you want peace, give peace to other people,
• If you want to be materially affluent, help other people to become materially affluent, and
• If you want love, give love to other people.
  

Over to you...

As you are going through your day today, ask yourself "What can you give to other people?" As you do this, observe what gifts you receive.

Acknowledgement
This article was originally written by Jane Taylor from Habits for Wellbeing. Jane is a wellbeing mentor who is passionate about helping people reconnect with their courage, so they can be the chief empowerment officer of their own life. You can read more about Jane here.

Reference -
Grant, A. (2013). Give and Take: Why Helping Others Drives Our Success. USA: Penguin.